G-pa (over the phone): Is Abbie there?
Mom: No. Why?
G-pa: Your mother is crying, wondering why everyone forgot her on her birthday.
Mom: But her birthday is next week...
G-pa: I know, I told her that but she didn't believe me. She's asking why no one called or gave her presents, so I was hoping Abbie would talk some sense into her.
Grandma, I know you grew up with 2 birthdays, since your dad was crazy forgetful and picked a random day to tell the school or something, and I'm sorry. But no way am I going to call you a full week before to pre-game your 2 birthday celebrations. Get over yourself.